God is funny

God is funny. really, He is.

He knows a gazillion times better than we do... or then we could ever know. He knows whats up...e knows the 411... this dude knows His stuff. i love that. i love that my ways suck compared to His and i love that He always shows me that. as much as it can hurt, i love it when God smacks me upside the head.

story... i was so determined to find a new mentor. things weren't working with my current one and i wanted to find someone else who would be "perfect". i found myself calling the few amazing women from my church that i knew, asking to meet with them to talk or to see if they'd be willing to meet with me weekly. nothing. people are busy. they didn't "match up to standards" for me. people are already mentoring someone... these amazing women were not supposed to be in my life under that label.

i didn't get it. things were crashing into me and areas of my life were tumbling down, and i had no one to pour my heart out to. i realized i was forgetting about the only One who i needed to run to. He was there waiting for me to run to Him. He wanted me. He was telling these other women, "no... Jackie is mine". i got smacked in the head... hard. i surrendered.

i continued to pray for a mentor, but wanted to wait until the Lord dropped someone right in front of my face. i was done running around like a chicken with it's head cut off, thinking that i knew better than the Dude upstairs.

the next weekend i met an amazing girl at a coffee house. we chatted a bit, and then i saw her again at a lunch thing after church where she proceeded to ask me, "i don't know why i'm asking this... but... do you have a mentor?"

long story short... she had been praying for me without even knowing that it was me. as soon as i surrendered and stopped worrying, and finally said, "okay Lord... You know better", this amazing girl was dropped into my lap out of no where. we soon after found out that the struggles that she is currently at the top of the mountain with and ending, i myself am at the bottom of the mountain just beginning those same exact trials.

...yeah... God is definitely funny. i love it.