Wednesday, September 13, 2006


Romania is one of the most beautiful countries in the entire world... yet among that beauty, spiritually speaking, it is probably one of the darkest places I have ever been engulfed in.

I first went to Romania right after my junior year of high school and then again after I graduated in 2003, but June 2005 was the last time I traveled there. Instead of being a student on the trip [as I was my first two years], in '05 I co-led a group of 10 fabulous high school students, and I can honestly say that it was one of the most amazing trips of my life.

Today is one of those days where I really miss being there. I miss the scenery... I miss seeing the stars... I miss walking everwhere... I miss going into a school and standing up in front of a class telling them about Jesus Christ... I miss going to small villages specifically to lay hands on the families lifting them up in prayer... I miss seeing the miracles that I saw... I miss... GOD speaking to me the way He did when I was there.

My friend Elizabeth went along with us last summer, but instead of coming home with us a month later, she stayed an extra 4 months. She's in this video that gives a brief synopsis of REMM's mission and goal: Romanian Evangelistic Medical Mission.

Getting emails and receiving phone calls from her every few weeks after our team had left to come back home was encouraging... the stories she had... the ways GOD was moving... the vision that was coming together... it all reminded me of how Faithful our Father is. My friend was able to give me intimate and detailed descriptions of what was happening - I felt like I was still standing directly in that battlefield with her. But it's hard some days [like today], where all I have to stay connected to Beius is a newsletter or a video every other month. I wish I could stand in that place again... just for a moment. I wish I had the honor to lay my hands on people with unknown illnesses again, boldly asking the LORD for a miraculous healing right then and there. I wish I could hold the hand of that little gypsy girl again, and tell her once more "Dumnezeu dragoste tu"... and I wish I could see her eyes light up again in awe.

Maybe one day.

As of right now, I don't feel that the LORD has called me to full time missions over in Romania. I absolutely love being there, but I am confident that He only wants me there for a few weeks at a time. Will I go back? I definitely hope He calls me back. I would love it... ideally, I'd love to do short term missions there with my husband, and then maybe again when I have kids.

But as I've been thinking about Romania non-stop today, He quickly reminded me that I am in the battle still. No I'm not standing on Romanian ground, but I'm standing among other intersessors throughout their country and throughout the world who are crying out for a healing to take place.

"Don't you trust that I am doing great things?"


I don't need to be there to see what I saw. I don't need to be there to hear Him the way I heard Him. I don't need to be there to boldly lift up the broken. I don't need to be there. I was priviledged to have been there. GOD needs to be there. And He is. And He's working. And healing. And breaking down the walls. And He's commanding the darkness to leave.

Today I felt a connection with Romania that I haven't felt in ten months. He's so faithful. He'll take you there and show you things without you having to actually be there. He told me some of the things He's doing and what to keep praying for. He reminded me [again] today that He's still speaking... I just need to ask.

Call to Me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

[Intimacy in the] Silence

"...I'd rather stand here speechless, with no great words to say..."

Great lyrics. Great song. Great worship.

It's amazing the things you'll hear from Him when silent. When we find ourselves sitting with hands folded, Bible in front of us, waiting on GOD, we have a burning desire to fill the air with our own voice. Whether that voice be our audible voice or just allowing our mind to run mad. It's quite sickening when you think about it.

Have you ever been able to sit in that complete silence, and truly leave it at that? Have you ever heard nothing? When I say nothing, I don't mean have you ever not heard from GOD, but I mean have you ever not heard... a single thing. No thoughts. No words. No sounds. Nothing. Complete and utter silence.

Have you ever been so in awe of Him, that you find yourself buried deep within the loudest silence that you have ever encountered? Now, that's complete silence. That's where He's calling us to be. That's where we will hear the most direction, and truth, and reassurance, and confirmation, than any other moment in our entire lives. That we would be willing to abandon everything going on around us, in order to passionately pursue our Greatest Lover. To love with complete abandonment... to lose ourselves, and sit in complete silence... to sit with Him in the most intimate place we could ever be...

"I Love you."... the greatest words you can hear while in that silence. They're full of nothing but GOD Himself. That should be enough... it needs to be enough... it is enough.

Enter that silence place.
Give everything.
Fall passionately in Love.

Believe it or not, there's a lot more in that silence than your own voice. There's a lot more than you would ever expect... you might be surprised.

"...In the silence, You are speaking..."